a mid-year check-in

sooooo...

Hi friends, how’s life been treating you lately?

It’s the end of June already. Crazy huh. I think I have this feeling once in a while whenever I go through busy seasons of life. Sometimes with work. Other times with personal stuff. Relationships. New hobbies. Courses. The list goes on.

Today let’s take a moment to quickly see what has happened over the first half of 2025. I wasn’t sure when I thought of doing a reflection post like this. Like, would anyone care to read what I’ve failed and achieved over the past months? Yet I decided to do it anyway thinking there is no other better time. The writing challenge I’ve been part of is ending soon after my next 2 posts, then 18 weeks will have officially passed. So it might also be a good reason to wrap things up a lil.

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Live life around my “me-want list”

Usually I don’t plan my year with too much details. Like everyone knows that resolutions fail right the moment you give that word attention. I started planning for this year much later when it’s already February something. I learned this from my friend who was also structuring her ideal year at that time. She has a Notion database called “can-do list” where she lists down all the things she’d love to explore and achieve throughout the year, with inspirational quotes, rationale behind and how to possibly get there (her goals). I referenced that to build my “me-want list”, in which I want to have clarity and intention before I put any items in the list.

Do I really want to do this thing or it’s just because I see someone else doing it and I’m FOMO etc etc.

Ignore my reading goal please..

I just love how it does not bring in the feeling of the daily to-do at work which never ends at some point. And while life happens, I can easily adjust and iterate it as I reprioritize life months to months. Sometimes I revisit this list, delete 1-2 items and add new ones in, making sure it’s updated and align with my personal values and goals. When there’re things lying on the list months over months and not getting any attention, you know that you need to review where you’re spending time and energy for. What’s working and what’s not working behind those non-ticked items. What’s really on your mind when writing them down and hoping to get them finished?

My me-want list is not a guidance, a life compass or something that is visionary and all. It is just a gentle reminder to check in with myself. That, for me, is enough.

Get better at answering the “how’s your week?” kind of questions

This idea is supposed to be written in detail in another blog post where I deep dive on ways to not shy away from check-in questions. But I can also briefly mention it here as I’ve been observing how I handle this.

I guess when you’re really cared for by someone’s asking such question, it feels less private and more exciting to tell others about your day/week/or month.

I love the act of catching up with friends from cơm-nhà lunches and dinners once or twice every month and we carefully listen to our friends’ updates, while having the best meals cooked by them. Someone just got offered a new job. Someone has been seeing someone else they love. Someone got fucked up at work. Someone is now free from the tư bản life that they wished to cut off long time ago. Someone has gotten more interest in someone else. These catchups feel as sacred as the traditional Vietnamese family meals when everyone needs gets to be fully present to share the moment together over good food or a weekend homemade nhậu table. Gossiping is totally not as fun. For real.

I think it’d be meaningful to be a bit personal in occasions like these. You don’t just tell your friends that “work has been ok” or “yeah my love life sucks”. I do find myself lazy getting into details when it’s via texts or from someone who I’m not really close with though. You’re adding stories, emotions, rationale and sometimes hidden thoughts behind what has already been told. Those are not fully featured in your facebook posts, instagram stories or thread rants. Your friends want to know if you feel lấn cấn after making such decision, or how relieved and sung sướng you are when you finally get rid of something that was on your shoulder for so long. And if they don’t want to know? Why are we even discussing about this lol.

We get to know our friends, while get to know ourselves in another level. Through these questions. A midnight call can become a therapeutic reflective session. A quick chat over a morning run that can ignite ideas. A 4-hour coffee talk just because.

On making sacrifices

When I took a life assessment on Health and Vitality area, I realized I didn’t compensate enough for my energy and my body capacity to handle all my needs and wants. It’s when the things I’ve noted down for struggles are much longer than ones I made in my wins, when it comes to staying active and live with wellness. I create conflict between my own desires and interests by not treating things that were supposed to earn more of my attention.

Dear my beloved Garmin, I’m sorry that I disappoint you sometimes

For example, I’m quite reckless with my nutrition and diet, which makes my training plan not fully effective and that I cannot recover quickly if I get injured. Or when I want good night sleeps to wake up feeling more energized the next day but didn’t care enough to shut down computer and phone early. Those small day to day things affect my life not one big hit at a time, but as compound effects in a negative way.

What happens when your life planning got ripped off by an unexpected event?

The only thing (probably the best thing) is to take action and change, quickly see how it’s gonna turn out instead of grieving about how it has already been fucked up. Make changes to your schedule on Google calendar. Actually follow it and see what happens. Rework your ideal week like you’re building and constantly releasing MVPs of your life. Cancel plans and dreams if really necessary.

Sometimes the sacrifice you make can vary as small as seeing your friends less often, quitting a no-longer-suit-you exercise, making a pause in your training plan—to as big as giving up on a promotion, or deciding not to pursue someone you adore

Living the life you desire isn’t just about making aesthetically looking lists or hours of journal and reflection. It's about the constant negotiation between who we want to be and what we're willing to give up to get there.

So yeah, as of all the learnings I’ve made in this first half of the year, it’s to mind the gap between your intention and execution.

Decisions come with sacrifices. Even if you don’t want to admit it.

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Phew.. That’s it for today, guys. If you’re still reading, comment with “🥂” to cheers with me that we’ve rocked this first half. Maybe tell me something you’re proud of yourself for doing in the past 6 months, too. I’d really love to hear about it. Mine: I’ve been keeping this blog alive so we have today’s newsletter lol.

See you next week xoxo. 🥂

With clarity and love,

Han

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Bài viết thuộc thử thách Viết Tiếp Sức mùa 3.

#wotnalumni #withmo